I just updated my other blog (requirement for a Personal Effectiveness class) and I feel good about my post. A snippet of my pathetic life:
"Hi! My name is.." Introductions.
My thoughts? Well, let's just say that I won't get an award for being
the friendliest person alive, ever. Sigh. A few years back, I've already
concluded that I'm the most introverted person I know. And I've already
accepted that fact. Small talks are not really my cup of tea (I prefer
coffee). Say, smacked in a room without any acquaintance, I won't talk
to anybody unless needed (i.e. groupings for reports and experiments).
The
Hi!-My-Name-Is part was a great deal easier than the second, and it
didn't really help that I got the word 'Father,' a subject which I'm
quite touchy about. I won't elaborate again, enough said last Tuesday.
'Kay? Good.
PS: I need professional help.
PPS: After the
2nd part of the introduction, when we were already discussing insights, a
though came to mind: I could have not shared my father issues, so to
speak, in front of strangers, but why did I? Heck, yeah, WHY did I?
Million dollar question, geez.
PPPS: It also doesn't help that my day-to-day conversations are just between me and my twenty other personalities. Sigh.
"I'm stressed."Yeah,
who isn't? Suck it up! Okay, scratch that. Tough it up! There. Sounds
less rude, doesn't it? Whenever I'm feeling a wee bit stressed, I do
internal monologues.
For example, I need to do a hometask for a
subject that I really hate. Hate is a very strong word -- deeply, deeply
dislike. Again. For example, I need to do a hometask for a subject that
I
deeply, deeply dislike.Excerpt
Me: Sooobrang haaasseeel, takte! [sic]
Konsensya:
Hoy, ang kapal ng mukha mong magreklamo! Ang daming tao d'yan na
gustong-gusto mag-aral, e, walang pambayad, tapos ikaw ilang taon ka na,
may allowance ka pa araw-araw!
I really think I'm already bordering on psychotic. Seriously. Whatever. Shrug the felling and do what you gotta do.
PS:
The excerpt above is a clean version. Most of the time, my internal
monologues can be quite inappropriate for PERSEF3 reflection papers.
The Normal ApproachShocker!
Yes, I do normal, too: I read, I watch movies or I catch up on my
series just to take my mind off the 'real stuff.' These actually take
place before the bloody pep talks. 'Yung tipong, 'If all else fails,
bloody pep talk na.'
"Like an inflated rubber ball, I bounce back."Yes, there are deflated rubber balls, and they don't bounce back.
I'm
a whatever happens, happens kind of person, BUT that doesn't mean that I
do not try my best to not screw things up. I'm just a realistic man -- I
don't get my hopes up. Okaaay, [sic] I
"TRY" to not get my hopes up! Geez, why so pushy? (Operative word? Go figure.)
PS: See, I'm psychotic. See, I talk to myself. Sigh.
I
do this. I do that. I fail. I sulk. I watch a movie (or an episode, or
read a chapter or two). I toughen up. I suck it up. I move on. Story of
my life.
Jokes aside, I can say that I'm a pretty resilient
person. Persistent as grass! Smile. Just like stress, I shrug my
sulkiness off and I move on (or most of the time, try again).
10:05 PM. I need to sleep. Smile.